A Killer Retreat Read online

  Aunt Lydia was the opposite. She had packed like some kind of foot soldier. There was a sleep roll at the top of her pack and a tin mess kit that rattled at the bottom. Had Rowen missed the memo? Was this a hippy-dippy New Age retreat or a cross-country trek?

  “Is Crystal here yet?” Lydia asked the women, like she and Spruce were on a first name basis.

  The other retreat-goers exchanged looks. “I don’t know,” said one.

  The skinniest of the lot cleared her throat. “I think she’s over that way.” She raised her arm and pointed a limp wrist in the vague direction of the nearest pavilion. “She has a tent.”

  Aunt Lydia nodded, the smile not once dropping from her face. “Well, I’m Lydia.” She turned sideways and made a grand sweeping gesture to everyone else still gathered around the back of her station wagon. “This is my family. That’s Nadine. That’s her daughters Willow and Peony there. And this is Rowen. She’s my niece, but I love her like she was my own.” She gave Rowen a pat on the back so hard it nearly made her drop her sleeping bag.

  “Nice to meet you,” said the skeletal woman. Her rictus grin looked creepy and forced. She didn’t bother to share her own name. Instead, she turned back to the gaggle of women surrounding her and resumed whatever conversation they’d been having before the Greensmiths had arrived.

  “All right,” Aunt Lydia said after a brief but awkward length of silence on her part. “Let’s go see where we check in. Come on, guys.” There was no doubt in Rowen’s mind that Lydia had been looking forward to this retreat for ages. There was no way she was going to let a rude first impression ruin her good time. She was too optimistic for that. Rowen respected that about her—even if she couldn’t do the same. She had expected eccentrics and weirdoes at the camp, not snobs. Things were looking more and more bleak with each passing moment.

  ***

  The “tent” that had been mentioned was really more like a party marquee than the rustic camping fare Rowen had expected. It was huge, with fancy silks draped over its white canvas walls to make it look more mysterious. When they stopped at the silk-shrouded entrance, Rowen wasn’t sure what to do next. No one was initially. It wasn’t like they could knock.

  It was Aunt Lydia who spoke up first—no surprise there. She wasn’t a shy person. “Excuse me!” she called. “Is anyone in there?”

  Rowen couldn’t be sure, but she thought she heard voices. If they were voices, they were hushed, like they didn’t want anyone outside to hear them. Maybe they were pretending like they weren’t there.

  “Excuse me?” Lydia tried again, louder this time. She could be quite loud when she wanted to be. The suddenness of it nearly made Rowen drop her sleeping bag again. Her hands reflexively wanted to cover her own ear. “We were just out here wondering if we needed to check in? Do you need to check our names off a list or something?”

  There was shuffling. Someone was inside. Rowen was sure of that this time. Sure enough, the silk parted a moment later, though the head that poked out didn’t belong to Crystal Spruce.

  “Hi there.” It was a woman. She had a round face and cat-eye glasses that rested on the end of her nose. Her heavy frown lines underlined the obvious fact that her smile was terribly forced. “Can I help you?” She emerged a bit more from the silk. Her hair was a deep black and lopped off at the shoulders. There was a clipboard in her hand and a business casual pantsuit on her body. This didn’t look like someone who would pay for a New Age retreat. This looked more like a personal assistant. That made sense. Crystal Spruce was almost certainly a business woman first after all.

  “Is Crystal in there?” asked Lydia, sounding like she and Spruce were close enough to be on a first name basis. She tried her best to look around the assistant as she spoke.

  The assistant stepped out completely from the tent, letting the silk doors flutter shut behind her. “I’m afraid Crystal is busy at the moment… She’s meditating. It’s important that she do so before the opening ceremony.”

  Rowen was almost certain that Crystal wasn’t meditating. She had heard talking coming from inside. The meditation thing sounded like something the assistant had come up with on the spot. No doubt she had a laundry list of metaphysical buzzwords to keep up Crystal’s professional image. If Lydia noticed, she didn’t mention it. Her friendly smile never wavered. “Ah, well, I’ll say hi to her later then.” Her eyes drifted down to the assistant’s clipboard. “So, do we need to check in?”

  “That’s not for another—” The assistant looked at the shiny watch on her wrist. “Eighteen minutes.” She hesitated again, a frown coming over her features. True to Rowen’s suspicions, the frown suited her a lot better than the smile did. “Was there no one down at the parking area to meet you?”

  “There were other guests,” said Aunt Nadine, speaking up for the first time. “No one approached us as an employee.”

  The assistant looked at her clipboard and gave a little huff. “There should have been someone there. I’m sorry for the inconvenience, ladies. I’ll fix this right away.” From somewhere near her hips she produced a pen. She clicked it open and thumbed through pages on the clipboard. “What are your names?”

  “I’m Lydia. This is Nadine. Those are her daughters over there, Willow and—”

  “The Greensmith party,” the assistant interrupted with a nod. “There one, two, three—Yes, I’ve got five of you here. You’re all paid up and good to go. You should have passed a wooden pavilion on your way here. You can put your things there for now. Our opening ceremony will begin shortly.”

  “Sounds good! And I appreciate the help… What was your name? I don’t think I caught it.” Lydia hadn’t caught the name because the assistant hadn’t given it.

  “Hmm?” The assistant was unhooking a walkie talkie from her belt. It took her a moment to make sense of Lydia’s question. “Oh… Ah, Veronica. It’s nice to meet you.” It didn’t sound like she found meeting the Greensmiths particularly “nice.” She didn’t much look like she had wanted to hand out her name. This was a woman who would much rather stay behind the scenes.

  “Nice to meet you too.” Lydia clapped Veronica on the shoulder. Veronica winced at the suddenness of it. “I’m sure we’ll be seeing each other around.”

  “I’m sure we will. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to see about tracking down an employee.”

  Lydia turned and headed back toward the pavilion. “She seemed nice,” she said to the rest of her family as they followed.

  “Phoenix?” Behind her, Rowen could hear Veronica talking into her walkie. “Phoenix, where are you? I just talked to some women who say you’re not doing your job.” She sounded angry. Rowen didn’t blame her.

  “I should go tell those other ladies what Veronica said.” Lydia put her bag down near the back of the wooden pavilion.

  “I’m sure someone will tell them,” said Rowen. “Veronica said she was settling it when we left, remember?”

  Lydia conceded that Rowen was probably right. She was thankful for that. Deep down, Rowen was a little worried that the women had already known where to go. They just hadn’t bothered to tell the Greensmiths as much. Rude camp mates, employees that didn’t do their jobs. The week to come was looking less and less fun by the moment.

  Chapter Three

  The opening ceremony didn’t happen when Veronica had said it would. It took ten more minutes than that. Rowen knew. She had counted each passing second as it seemed to stretch into forever.

  The pavilion slowly filled up with people. Thankfully, the snobbish group of too-skinny women weren’t the only other people who had signed up for the retreat. There were a couple of women around Rowen’s age that appeared to be friends. There was one man who had come by himself. He was pudgy and balding and sat alone. Finally, there was a heavyset woman who was wearing an entire dream catcher around her neck. Rowen wasn’t so sure about that last one. She stuck close to her family, her cousins in particular. None of them were eager to go socializing. Not that their stayi
ng put deterred Aunt Lydia or Nadine. They made their rounds, introducing themselves and pointing back at Rowen, Willow, and Peony often. Rowen didn’t much appreciate being introduced to people against her own will, but what could she do about it? She stayed quiet and sat still on the concrete floor. It was easiest to pick her battles.

  There was a small wooden stage at the far end of the pavilion. It looked like it had been constructed somewhat recently out of cinder blocks and plywood. It was there that Crystal finally made her appearance.

  She was everything Rowen remembered on top of a few changes she had half expected. Crystal was older now. It showed on her chest and neck, both exposed by the low-cut tank top she was wearing. The skin of her face, however, was pulled tight. She’d had work done and it was obvious work at that. Rowen had to remind herself that plastic surgery wasn’t a bad thing. It wasn’t something she would ever do unless there was a medical need, but it wasn’t like it was her place to judge folks who did get work done. It was just that the plastic surgery didn’t really jive with the image Crystal was always trying to project. She preached eating raw healthy foods and alternative medicine, and nature, nature, nature. Her tight face didn’t look very natural. Nor did her perky cleavage.

  “Hello, everyone!” Crystal jogged up onto the stage. She had the build of a runner, some wiry muscles on her lanky frame. “Welcome to the first official Crystal Spruce retreat!”

  There was scattered applause and cheers. It wasn’t very loud. Rowen only counted about sixteen people aside from her own family. It worried her. Was this cost effective for Spruce? Aunt Lydia had said there were limited spots open for the retreat. If that was the case then how much were tickets? Just how much money had Aunt Lydia paid for this farce?

  “I feel so much good energy here,” Crystal said once the applause ended. “You’re all such… old souls.” She touched a hand to her chest. “I can feel it here. I feel like we’ve all met before, outside of this temporary existence. I feel like that drew us together here now.”

  “I’ve never met that woman in my life,” said Willow, a little too loudly.

  Aunt Nadine shushed her daughter and then looked around, red-faced, hopeful that no one had overheard. Rowen fought hard to keep a smile off of her face. It was a losing battle.

  “I’m looking forward to spending time with all of you over the coming week,” Crystal continued. “We have a lot of activities planned. I’m confident everyone here will go home changed. I have to warn you that a lot of the work we’ll be doing here will be illuminating. Your mind will expand in ways you could never imagine. You’ll be wiser, more aware of the changing of the seasons and the ebb and flow of magic all around us.” Crystal motioned grandly to their surroundings. “I’m sure some of you may be wondering why I chose to have my first retreat all the way out here in Lainswich.” She paused for effect, and Rowen couldn’t help but be intrigued. She had wondered the same thing herself. Lainswich was a difficult place to find. It was shrouded by magic. News of what went on in the town rarely traveled outside of its borders. When information left Lainswich, it was only because the town itself wanted it to.

  Crystal walked to the edge of the stage and sat down. It was a move that Rowen had seen motivational speakers make. It didn’t translate well given their current location. The stage was too small for her legs to dangle off. Her feet hit the floor early and made the tops of her knees come up to her ribcage.

  “Lainswich is a rare find that I came upon decades ago. Maybe some of you have heard of the Stonewall family? They had a hand in founding this place. They’re also a family of hereditary witches.” Crystal paused for effect, and Rowen couldn’t help but look around at her own family to try and gauge their reaction. The Greensmiths had had a hand in Lainswich’s development as well. They were also a family of hereditary witches.

  “I’m close, personal friends with the Stonewalls,” Crystal continued. Rowen had doubts about her claim. She had known the Stonewalls for ages, and she had never once heard them mention Crystal Spruce. She had never seen them at a signing or seen one of her books on any of their shelves. If they knew Crystal at all, Rowen imagined them being annoyed by her mere existence. Then again, Rowen still didn’t understand what members of her own family saw in the woman.

  “The Stonewalls told me that this place was a nexus of magical energy. There are ley lines here, special properties in the soil itself, magnetism.” Again, Crystal paused for effect. “I want you to all do me a favor. Close your eyes.”

  Rowen glanced around, like she did any time someone asked her to close her eyes. She made eye contact with about half a dozen other people as she did so. What was it about closing your eyes on command that made people nervous? It was like they were worried no one else would close their eyes, that they would be the only person looking silly. Rowen didn’t want to close her eyes, but she did so anyway when she saw that the rest of her family had. Granted, there was a good chance Willow and Peony had simply fallen asleep again.

  “Relax your breathing,” said Crystal. “Let yourself be in the moment. Really be present, be mindful in your body.” She fell silent, giving everyone an opportunity to do as she had instructed. “Can you feel it? Can you feel the magic all around us?”

  Rowen didn’t feel anything she hadn’t felt before. She couldn’t deny that Lainswich was a magical place. Maybe she was so used to magic that she simply didn’t notice it all the time. Maybe she was desensitized to it.

  Some affirmative murmurs rose up, as well as a couple of all too dramatic gasps. Had they felt anything at all? Rowen rather doubted it. She opened her eyes and saw the rich housewives looking all too pleased with one another. Most likely they had imagined any energy they thought they had felt. Not that Rowen was going to point that out to anyone.

  “If you didn’t feel anything, don’t worry,” Crystal added once the murmuring had finished. “You’ll feel it before the week is over. Everyone has that magical spark inside of them, and I was put into this world to kindle that spark into a fire.” She smiled broadly out to the crowd and stood. “Tonight, we’ll be having our first cookout—Vegetarian, of course. All of that will be followed with some intense meditation. Until then, it’s important to me that you all get to know each other better. I’ll break the ice and go first.” She struck a pose at the edge of the stage, hands on her hips. “I’m Crystal Spruce.” She chuckled. “Obviously. I’m sure you all know my name, but there’s more to me than just being one of the most prolific New Age authors alive today.”

  Crystal launched into a lengthy diatribe about her past, leading all the way up to plans she had for the future. It was all very flattering… and terribly unrealistic. According to her she had been all over the world, sat by the side of spiritual gurus of every nation. She had learned secrets in the Himalayas and lived with shamans in Africa. She was well-respected all around the globe.

  “Is she all that well-respected here?” Willow whispered, making a point to lean close to Rowen and keep her voice barely audible. She didn’t want another scolding from her mother.

  Rowen had to fight not to laugh again. She shook her head and mouthed the words, “I don’t think so.”

  “It’s my hope that by this time next year, I’ll be able to host an even larger retreat,” continued Crystal, her speech winding down. “It’s also my hope that I’ll be seeing a lot of the same faces next to new ones.” She gave her audience a wink. “Well, I need to go make sure our next activity is in order. Until then, Phoenix here will be helping you learn a little more about one another.”

  Phoenix had been lingering just outside of the pavilion. Rowen hadn’t noticed him until he stepped in. He looked like he was in his twenties with a scrabbly beard and a slim build. His legs were long, and the black glasses on his nose were clunky plastic that didn’t look quite right. Did they even have lenses? This certainly looked like the kind of hipster, 20-something guy that would shirk his duties to run off and smoke pot. He wasn’t anything like Veronica. Rowen wond
ered how he had even gotten the job.

  “Hey there everyone! I’m Phoenix!” He waved a hand and grinned wide. Rowen couldn’t help but notice Veronica off to one side, scowling at him over the top of her clipboard. She probably had her own questions about how he had gotten the job. Either that or she knew and that was why she was so angry. “Can I get everyone to form a semicircle?” He hopped off the stage and walked to the center of the pavilion.

  “I look forward to seeing you all tonight!” Crystal called back to the camp goers as she walked toward her giant tent. Veronica hurried along behind her.

  “That’s kind of lame, isn’t it?” asked Peony, softly. “It’s, like, forever until dinner. I thought she was supposed to be the one leading this thing?”

  “I’m sure running a camp is hard,” Aunt Nadine said in the woman’s defense. “They don’t have many people on staff, so I’m sure she’s very busy.”

  Rowen didn’t point out that Crystal should have also been in charge of staffing the event. Instead she stood and followed Aunt Lydia to the circle gradually forming around Phoenix. The rest of the Greensmiths soon joined them. Rowen noted that the housewives sat in their own little group, making a point to keep several feet between themselves and anyone else.

  Phoenix didn’t make anyone scoot in close, thankfully. Rowen wasn’t eager to sit next to people who didn’t want to associate with her. “So, why don’t we go around the circle and introduce ourselves. He placed a hand on his chest. “I’m Phoenix… Which, ah, I think I already said.” He laughed like that was a joke. It was around then that Rowen really caught a whiff of him. He smelled like pot. So that was what he was doing when he should have been near the entrance.

  “I’m a college student, but I’m on, like, break right now,” Phoenix continued. “Well, not really break. It’s more like I’m taking a hiatus. I felt like I needed some me time, so I took time off to travel the world. I wanted to see new faces, meet new people. Travel is really important, I think. It’s good for the soul, you know?”